I'm into threesomes.

Eavesdropping is a past time of mine. While chowing down a quick dinner, I heard this:

"Logan definitely loves you. I mean, he has waited 2 years for you."

A usual beginning of a bad conversation. 

The problem: 

1. Love is assumed to be equal to the patience a guy has for sex.
2. Sex is being talked about within a dating relationship, not marriage.
3. It is also assumed that there's a right time to have sex other than after marriage. 

This conversation is too common and we only have ourselves to blame.

Why?

Because we give our girls the "sex talk" when we should be giving the "your worth" talk.  

Because we're showing our girls that life is complete after marriage when its really complete after death.

Girls, you are not saving yourself for a boy. You're saving yourself for God.


Boys, a girl is not your reward. You don't get to take her to bed because you love her or because you were patient enough to wait two, three or five years. If you are blessed enough to be married to a woman, she is God's gift to you.

Let's speak to our loved ones in a way that says, "I know you're worth more. I know you belong to more." Maybe, if we spoke and taught with this mindset, things would change.

Maybe, if we stopped trying to take God out of the equation...

It's not Boy Meets Girl. 
It's Boy meets God. Girl meets God. God brings Boy and Girl together. 
Boy and Girl glorify God together. 
It's a threesome. 

How's that for wild?

Not exactly wedded bliss.

Last Wednesday, my parents celebrated 27 years of marriage.

Witnessing most of it, I can tell you that it hasn't been easy or fun all the time.
However, it's a perfect example of a redeemed marriage. Though there's been turmoil, there is no giving up. I used to resent them for that but now I admire them.


It takes strength, endurance and love to keep pressing on with someone that's getting on your last nerve. 

I don't know much about this topic but because of them, I know you don't give up.

They've grown a lot in recent years, partially because they recognize it's going to be just them very soon. I'm so proud of them.

The talk.

I came into the living room flaunting the new skirt I bought for India.


How naive of me. 
The next thing I know my dad throws out the ultimatum I've been fearing.
"Either you go back to school or find someone to marry."
I chuckle.
He doesn't. 

"Nincy, this is not a laughing matter. You need to do one or the other." 

Tantrum begins.

I'll be honest, I understand where my dad is coming from. He doesn't want me to live under his house forever. And I have been getting quite comfortable the 1.5 years I've been there. 

School is my choice though I'm dragging myself to take the GMAT. 

(Oh Managerial Accounting, why must you be a requirement for an MBA?) 

But if you don't mind, I'd like to talk about this pushing of the daughter down the aisle. 

At the moment, I'm happily single. 

I'm using this season of my life to accomplish God's work.  I've come to treasure this season as a gift; it's a priceless time to invest in myself and have some fun. 

Sure, I get lonely and a boyfriend would be helpful for wedding dates, holidays, formal events and movie nights. 

But I'm OK.


My life is not put on pause because I'm not married.  I have many of the same joys and heartbreaks as the girl who is married next to me. 

So I speak for the single. 

We are normal.

We are embracing this season of life. 

We have no problem with marriage, it's just not for now.

And that's OK.
In fact, it is good.

To my friends and acquaintances who are wondering how in the world I can be happy without getting my  MRS degree from the school that seems to give them out freely:

The source of happiness is skewed.
Proudly displaying a MRS degree does not mean happiness.
Happiness is not a boy.

I am normal.
A man does not fulfill nor complete me.
Nor does he define my future.
And don't set me up with your cousin. (Unless he really is my type, then fine.)


Instead, lets talk about politics, blogs, fashion, movies and all the other things that I enjoy... just like you.

I guess I can be friends with married people.

I have on fake nails. I haven't had fake nails since I was 16.

Today I have them on because this weekend, there is a special occasion. My best friends are getting married. To each other. And I get to witness this moment with many of our friends.

It's extremely exciting and nerve-wrecking, too!
This will be my first time at having married friends. And for a single girl, it can mean bad things.

Thankfully, I have friends that are mindful of their time and those around them but i'm aware that things may change:

First of all, Clayton won't have to come over anymore. Clayton will just be. 
I'll probably want to use the guest bathroom from now on.
No more trundle bed. 
I'll want to fall asleep before them.
No more just walking into Caro's bedroom. KNOCK ALWAYS.
Not all of the dresser drawers will be Caro's so check which side is hers before going through them.
We'll be listening to a lot less country.

Just to name a few.

Really though, this is the most exciting thing to happen. What more could a 23 year old that's still getting over college want? One of her two very best friends getting married to each other after a 3 year relationship that's destined to be.

I'll be balling my eyes out this weekend while thinking of all the memories to come.